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Thursday, May 19, 2016

We Promised To Stop Crying . . .

. . . and we have. . . almost. We can look at a rainbow and smile now. We can look at the fresh blooms on the plants and trees and smile. We can look at pictures of past places we traveled as a pack and mostly smile. It's still very difficult to come home to one less ole boy who used to keep the 'girls' from going bananas over us. It's hard to brush the girls and not have our buddy move as close as he can to ensure the brush gets his big head or back instead of someone else. It's still hard to serve dinner to only two sets of eyes waiting patiently under the table, peaking out to see if they can sneak a kibble before I say eat.

We've mostly stopped crying when we think of our big shouldered boy who insisted on pushing the girls away so he was always first to get in between our legs for a cuddle as we walked by. We even mostly stopped crying when we mow the lawn and see his spot now being used by his sisters.

Does it still hurt? Boy oh boy it sure does. The intense stabbing pain has subsided now to a dull constant ache. We have even giggled once when we recalled how every day at feeding times, with out fail, he made sure to sneak into the room where I was refilling the food bin. If my eyes met his, he quick as a wink took off in the opposite direction as if to say, "Nope, it wasn't me you just saw. I'm waiting patiently under the table like a good boy mom!"

We've almost stopped now.

We were given a beautiful diamond shaped rainbow crystal. It hangs in my kitchen window over looking the back yard where we spent much of our fair weathered days. It sends a constant reminder of his healthy spirit playing over Rainbow Bridge now. Thank you Aunty Jean.

We were given a beautiful butterfly that changes it's colours in the rainbow shades to stand in our garden just under his Prayer Flags. I can watch it in the evenings and almost smile now. Thank you Holly and Taylor. Yes, we finally found the strength to hang his Flags beside his big sister, Duchess Sammy's. I didnt cry much as daddy walked up to set them just right and let his spirit fly. I hardly cried at all when I took pictures to share here.

I almost didn't cry when I saw the first beautiful monarch butterfly of the year in the garden under his flags on the same day we hung them.
I almost didn't cry when I saw the first TWO red rose buds appear the day after we hung his flags.

We didn't cry too much when we spoke to Aunty Bonny and told her we were coming to visit her and Uncle Lou on Van Is. We tried our darnedest not to cry when we told Aunty Jean we'll be seeing her then too.

We're doing pretty good at keeping our promise. We are able to smile when we touch our big boy's urn as he rests with Duchess Sammy now.
He is home with us. For as long as our hearts beat he will be with us.
He is FOREVER our Leader of The Pack.

"You have gone ahead, And nothing is the same.
Leaving paw prints on our hearts,
that will always remain"
Until We Meet Over Rainbow Bridge . . .

1 comment:

caymus11 said...

such a wonderful post Del..blessings for the future! Cheryl & Dave